Guitars

I think I'm going to drop a few thoughts about one of my favorite topics; guitars.

I've been thinking a lot about guitars lately, because my house was robbed a couple months ago and most of my guitars got ripped off. I've been gigging with borrowed gear, thanks to some very generous family and friends. When we get the money from the insurance settlement, it's time to go shopping.

Now, for you women who have to put up with men complaining about your shopping, you know that we're just as bad. The difference is that we don't make you go with us when we go. 'Nuff sed.

Anyway, I lost five guitars, but now I'm thinking about what I'd get if I'd taken 5 guitars worth of money and had a chance to re-spend it. One thing I definitely want is a hollow-body electric. I once had a really good one, a blonde Gibson ES-175. Had to sell it to pay the bills, and been kicking myself ever since. It's not the kind of guitar I'd use all the time, but I love to play them. The other main thing I need is a good solidbody with single-coil pickups. Strats are good, although I'll probably do a mod on the electronics. A good Telecaster can do anything.

Here's where we get into one of my pet peeves; "tone woods." What most manufacturers call "tone woods" I consider toneless. Alder, basswood, poplar . . . These woods make dead guitars. Which can be a good thing, if your style of play includes a lot of processing. These kind of woods send a much simpler signal into your processor, and if that's what you do, then that's what you need. I like to serve mine up Rory Gallagher style; guitar, cord, amp. The rig acts more like an acoustic instrument when you run a simple set-up. For that, I much prefer heavy, resonant hardwoods like mahogany, ash, and maple.

One thing I'm considering is having a custom guitar made. In a way, I'd like to start collecting favorite instruments. An SG, a Strat, a Tele, things like that. On the other hand, I've always wanted to have an uber-guitar made. One that was exactly the way I want it.

So, here's what that would be:

Short scale. 24.75", like a Les Paul. Nice, C-shaped neck that was thin, but fit snugly in the palm of your hand.

Mahogany, with maple top and back. I've got the slab of maple, too. Birdseye, cut in New Hampshire, sliced into plank back in 1978 by my father-in-law. Beautiful wood, and rings like brass.

Carvin humbuckers, with coil splitters.

Graphite saddles and nut. No tremolo.

There it is; my Christmas list for '06. All donations cheerfully accepted.

And, I would, of course, love to know your thoughts on the subject.

r